confused and hurting

How can one feel when the doctor does an ultrasound at 11 weeks and gets no heartbeat or movement but found one at 7 weeks? I am so confused right now and hurting because I don't know what is going on or if the baby is even alive. I am three wonderful children and have never miscarried. I'm lost, hurt, and heartbroken especially if they don't find a heartbeat tomorrow. How can someone get over losing a baby you never got to meet except through ultrasound? No mother should have to hear those words I'm not getting hearbeat. Why did my body fail me and this baby? I really hope tomorrow I can write again but only with wonderful news such as they found a heartbeat and it was only hiding the other day. I don't know what to think or do.