Saturday, November 24, 2012

Thanksgiving

Precious angel,

I hope you had a great first thanksgiving in heaven. I missed you bad that day my angel. I kept thinking about what it would have been like to take care of you like I should have been doing. I know the family would have spoiled you and you would have loved it. I know that you are being spoiled up in heaven everyday but it isn't the same thing. I'd rather have you here instead of there. I wanted to be able to take care of you and get to know the precious baby you would have become. I wanted to watch you grow up and make me proud of the adult you would have become. I dream about you and everything I know you would have done or accomplished. Every time I feel your sister move and kick, it warms my heart because I think of you and what it would have felt like to feel you do that inside me. I feel robbed because I didn't get that far with you or even have the chance to hold and love on you. I love and miss you my angel.

Your mommy

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

7 months

My Dearest Kennedy,

I know I'm a couple days late posting but your on my mind every day. I can't help but to wish that you were here instead of in heaven. I have dreams about what it would have been like to be taking care of you and watching you grow up. Your due date came and went which was hard that day and that weekend. I keep thinking that I should have a newborn to take care of instead of mourning your loss. Your siblings helped me get through that weekend but I still missed u like I do everyday. I look at the ultrasound pictures of u that I have hanging on the wall and dream about the baby you would have become. I wish I would have gotten to experience everything with you that I am experiencing with your sibling. I missed feeling you kick and turn inside me. I missed the special time we would have gotten to spend together while you were inside me and then when you were born. I missed just being pregnant with you for a whole nine months. I'm glad I got 11 weeks with you but I wish I could have had more. I know it sounds like a selfish mom but I am entitled. I had my baby taken from me before I got the chance to say hello. Watch over me my angel and have fun in heaven with everyone. I love and miss you everyday.

Your mommy